I like to call myself an accidental engineer and by the end of this story, I’m pretty sure you’ll see why.

Seventh grade Divyam was a walking national anthem. Patriotism coursed through his veins, fueled by war movies and endless rounds of “Saare Jahaan Se Achcha Hindustan Hamara.” So, when my friend Manish, mentioned the defence exams, I was hooked ! Dreams of camouflage and combat filled my head.

Life, however, is a master of curveballs. One evening, my dad, eyes glued to the newspaper, stumbled upon an ad for a prestigious IIT-JEE coaching institute called Aakash. Intrigued, he nudged me to take their entrance test. I, ever the obedient son, aced it (still don’t know how). The scholarship offer that followed was substantial, and with a middle-class sigh, my father declared Aakash my new destiny. It wasn’t all that bad. Aakash is where I met Varun, the guy who’d become my partner-in-crime for the next few years. Together, we navigated the treacherous waters of 11th grade, our study sessions taking frequent (and delicious) detours to Chinatown for steaming plates of fried rice and Manchurian.

Then came the monstrosity called Covid and everything went under a complete lockdown. Twelfth grade was a blur of online classes, patchy internet connection, and a whole lot of uncertainty. Studying went out the window and I was “shitting bricks” at the thought of having to write my board exams. I was clinging on to a desperate hope that the boards would be cancelled. (Spoiler alert: they were). Miraculously, even with my “wasted” year, I managed to pull off a stellar 91.2 in my (thankfully cancelled) boards.

Here’s where things get interesting. I cleared the defence exams, the interviews which were going to take place at Dehradun, looming large. But as the reality of the military’s tough life settled in, a flicker of doubt ignited within me. Was this the life I truly craved? At that point I had begun to feel like the life that would be expected of me in the defence services was diametrically opposed to my personality and the answer was a resounding no. So, I did what any self-respecting teenager facing an existential crisis would do – I took a drop year. This time, albeit in bits and pieces, I prepared well enough for the exams. Surprisingly, it worked. I landed a decent percentile in the engineering entrance exams and found myself staring at my provisional admission letter for NIT Agartala. Civil engineer Divyam Raj Singh? The same guy who dreamt of camouflage and combat? Life, it seemed, had a strange sense of humour. “It kept edging me over and over again.”

College slowly became my escape from the echo chamber of my teenage years. The Divyam of the past would be surprised to meet the Divyam of today. Back then, my political views were basically a megaphone blasting on repeat. Online arguments or offline? My battleground. I loved being seated in controversy (still do).

College, however, promised a different kind of medium for expression. Enter the Nita Literary Club. Debating was a sport I could get behind. The thought of dismantling someone’s logic came to me like pure bliss. Maybe a touch sadistic, but hey, everyone has their quirks, right? But college also taught me a valuable lesson: timing is everything. Arguments had to be earned, not barged into. So, I learned to pick my battles, to choose when to use my verbal artillery and when to simply listen. Ironically, this didn’t mean my political fire dimmed. It just got channeled. Debates were my natural habitat. The thrill of dismantling an opponent’s argument, of leaving their logic in ruins, was exhilarating. Joining the NLC was a no-brainer. Here, I could indulge in my love for controversy without getting banned.

Then along with a few like-minded individuals, I also built a club from scratch. A new outlet for our passions - MUNSOC. The Model United Nations Society. The challenges were immense, but the learning curve steeper. This, along with the NLC, became the cornerstone of my college experience. Later, I found myself General Secretary of the NLC! This wasn’t a popularity contest win. My involvement with MUNSOC, ironically, hadn’t endeared me to all the seniors. However, the unwavering support of my batchmates propelled me to the spot. But I truly believe that I was completely deserving of the position of responsibility that was given to me. It was earned through a lot of efforts and is a testament to my knack for leadership because it did not come through blind favouritism.

The funny thing is, I found myself at the helm of not just the NLC, but also another club – a rival one! Instead of acting as a bridge, I have become a firewall between them, ensuring healthy competition without unnecessary drama. And even though people sometimes believe, rather naïvely, that I am on “their side”, I am on no one’s.

I marvel at all of this now. Even though I initially entered clubs with trepidation, they soon became a source of dynamic experiences for me. From navigating power struggles to fostering healthy competition, I emerged, not unscathed, but definitely stronger. My experiences, both personal and professional, taught me to adapt and overcome.

The social aspect of college, however, was a whole new frontier. During the first year of my college life, my social circle could fit in the palm of my hand and girls were pretty much an alien species. To add to all of it, my default expression was a scowl, a permanent frown - which didn’t help my situation at all. College was a rollercoaster ride for me. Freshman year, I had this notion that no human being could be trusted. I was a fortress. I distrusted everyone, even my family. But slowly, in this crucible of shared experiences, cracks began to appear in my walls. In my second year here, I allowed myself to trust a select few, forging friendships that became my anchor, here.

My advice for incoming students is simple: relax, have fun, and work hard for what you love. Don’t get hung up on titles or positions – true rewards come naturally when you pursue your passions. Life is inherently unfair. People will have advantages, and sometimes, you’ll work hard and still fall short. But whining about it won’t change anything. Instead, accept this harsh reality and move on. Focus on the present and stay unburdened by your past. People, I believe, are generally self-absorbed, so don’t expect them to dwell on your feelings. Develop a practical outlook – it will help you weather life’s storms, both good and bad.

And always remember that success shouldn’t breed arrogance, and failures shouldn’t cripple you. Emotional stability is key. Find a balance, and you’ll be well on your way to living a life free from unnecessary drama. I think that in the end, it’s about being comfortable in your own skin, unfazed by who comes and goes in your life. Emotional detachment really is a superpower.

Ten years from now, reminiscing about college, I want to remember the fun, the experiences, the good times and the bad – the whole rollercoaster ride. Not the grades or the CGPA. College life, for me, has been about creating a treasure trove of stories to tell, a testament to a legendary time filled with all kinds of experiences. I want to be remembered as a good person, someone people could confide in and get sound advice from. A chill, fun friend to be around.

And even though my advice for future college students is to develop a sense of emotional detachment and understand that life is unfair and accept it as a harsh reality, know what matters and what doesn’t and not get stressed over trivial things, this detachment doesn’t mean being uncaring. It’s about being aware of the realities of life and setting realistic expectations. It’s about not getting bogged down by disappointments and learning to adapt when plans go awry.

I acknowledge the downside of this approach – a lack of urgency or motivation, especially when exams are looming. The adrenaline rush that comes with wanting to do well can be a powerful motivator, and that’s something I miss now. Finding a balance between detachment and that healthy dose of stress is something I’m working on.

On the topic of dating and romantic relationships - Karan Johar’s movies have glorified college life as being all about hookups and endless fun. However, I entered college with zero expectations, determined to be stress-free after the ordeal of getting in. My first year was exactly that – I had zero girls on my instagram profile and zero interest in dating.

Second year rolled around, and my views on dating remained firm: a colossal waste of time. College, I believe, is about having fun, meeting people, and enjoying good company, not getting tied down by commitments. Love and relationships are absolutely not on my agenda.

While I’ve never actively pursued anyone, I have found myself in quite a few interesting situations where I’ve made it abundantly clear that I’m not interested in commitment. Up for hanging out and having a good time? Sure! But as far as commitment is concerned, please stay six feet away from me. If you come in with expectations, you will leave with disappointment. You are going to get hurt and extremely hurt, because I will not take a moment to dissociate you from my life completely in a way that I will never approach or talk to you again and it is something that will not affect me in any manner whatsoever. No emotional attachment, no regrets.

Some might scoff, “What if the tables turn someday?” Thank you for your concern but I’ve got that all covered too. My emotional detachment acts as a shield, protecting me from heartbreak. So to those hoping to see me fall someday, best of luck! It will never happen.

I sometimes wish I read more. I have never been an avid reader but I did take up reading “Half Girlfriend” obsessively and read it from cover to cover in merely 6 hours. Perhaps a different genre or another recommendation from another friend will reignite my interest for reading again. I am no fan of sports and I admit my shortcomings when it comes to physical activity. My gym membership in 2021 was a valiant effort, but laziness won in the end. I recognize the need for a change and hope to address it in my third year. Maybe the dream of average-person fitness will become a reality for me someday soon.

As for hobbies, I think I might have none. There’s web development but it’s more a means to an end rather than a passion. For pure enjoyment, it’s computer games – a vast spectrum from the bizarre to the mainstream. Grand Theft Auto San Andreas reigns supreme in my gaming world. The storyline, characters, and the escape into a world where anything goes keeps me coming back for more.

I think I might be a walking paradox of sorts because even though I preach openly about emotional detachment, I am HUGE on living in nostalgia - indulging in old cartoons, Tom and Jerry reruns, and classic games. This fondness for the past can sometimes turn obsessive, leading to all-night binges on shows and horror movies. The fear factor adds to the thrill, even if it means being scared half to death. Although I reckon, third year with a single room will put a temporary pause on the horror genre but I’m pretty sure it’s just going to be a temporary hiatus.

My taste in music leans towards high-energy pop and rock, anything that gets me pumped. Lyrics and mellow tunes bore me easily. If I’m ever recommended a song with good lyrics or an old song with a slow tempo, I tend to not listen to it more than 10-20 seconds because it bores me and people might say that I do not value art then and they’re absolutely right! If everyone began appreciating art then then the world would be a good place. But hey, the truth is that the world is not a good place! The Daft Punk song “One More Time” is definitely my current favourite, thanks to the party vibes and it’s association with the wonderful time I’d had at IIT Bombay’s Mood Indigo where I first came across it. Maybe that’s all a person needs sometimes – a drama free love life, a little push into doing the things that they love doing and are good at, a few friends to sail along, a hearty meal at the shopping complex and a soundtrack to their life’s journey.

These past two years in college have been beautiful in their own way. I’ve shed some of my rigidity, embraced new experiences, and discovered my hidden talent for adaptability. Sure, there are areas for improvement – like my fitness level and maybe finding a more productive hobby – but that’s all part of the journey. I look to the next two years with open arms, eager to see what challenges and adventures await. With a newfound openness to life’s possibilities, I really look forward to stepping into the next chapters of my story. There’s no life I’d rather be living than this one. Some accidents make life fuller, more beautiful afterall, you know!

Piece written by - Harshita Shankar